Yesteryear

​I miss those old Time Life infomercials for mix tapes of songs from yester-year.

Announcer Voice: DON’T MISS YOUR CHANCE TO OWN A PIECE OF MUSICAL HISTORY! THIS EPIC, 9-DISC COLLECTION INCLUDES SMASH HITS SUCH AS:

(40s Ladie's Vocals):
A kiss on the clit can be quite continental,
But, dildos are a girl’s best friend.
Some head would be grand, but it can’t pay the rental on your porn hub fee-
Why do you like to see girls pee?
 
Announcer: AND!!! DON’T FORGET ABOUT THIS TIMELESS CLASSIC:

(Haunting):
Wheeeere the boys are,
I’ll be on my knees-
Wet lips apart,
Gag reflex off,
Dying to blow you, tenderly…
 
Announcer: ALL YOUR FAMILY FAVORITES! HITS ENJOYED ACROSS THE GENERATIONS, LIKE THE ALWAYS BELOVED:

​(Lightly, longingly):
I’ll be touching you in all the moist, familiar places,
That this cunt of mine embraces,
Fuck me, too…
 
Annnouncer: ALL THIS AND MORE CAN BE YOURS FOR JUST 16 EASY PAYMENTS OF $39.95 PER MONTH PLUS SHIPPING AND HANDLING! ORDER NOW!!!